Jul 15, 2018 22:37:18 GMT
Post by Taliah Dawson on Jul 15, 2018 22:37:18 GMT
"I'm so sorry for your loss"
The phrase had been repeated nearly a dozen times and yet the words still held no meaning for Taliah. Her teachers were sorry, her classmates were sorry, even family members that they hadn't heard from in several years were sorry, Liah was virtually drowning in apologies and yet she still felt unbearably hollow as she cradled Tanya's head in the crook of her arm. It was then that the young girl realized that the well wishers weren't sorry for what happened, they were sorry that there was nothing they could do to make it better. The apology did far more for them then it would ever do for her. As the young girl reflected on the uselessness of the sentiment, a prickly 'pins and needles sensation had begun in her fingertips and was rapidly sweeping up the length of Taliah's arm indicating that the appendage was 'falling asleep but she dare not move out of fear of disturbing the slumbering child. In a way it was somewhat reflective of her current state of mind. A fascinating, yet perplexing blend of numbness and pain. With Tanya resting comfortably in her arms, Taliah then shifted her gaze to Tanice whom instinctively turned to face her at precisely the exact same moment. As twins, the pair had always shared a deep bond that often allowed them to communicate with one another with a simple glance or unassuming gesture.
Which proved invaluable these days as her sister had all but ceased speaking since being informed that their father had gone to heaven. Their mother had grown frustrated on several occasions with Tanice's vow of silence, but Taliah knew that her sister would speak again when she was ready and that her healing couldn't be rushed. Taliah gestured towards Tanya with her head then returned her gaze to Tanice who nodded in understanding and opened her arms allowing Liah to deposit their sister into them. Liah slid off the loveseat that the three of them had been huddled together on and timidly shuffled into the living room where their guests for lack of a better word had been gathered. Having run out of cliche and wholly meaningless expressions of encouragement, comfort, and support, the mourners had moved on to leave the family of four to stew in their grief. As much as the incessant chatter had annoyed Taliah, as she scurried from room to room seeking out her mother, the young girl decided that the awkward silence that had settled upon the home was infinitely worse.
Having scoured the entire lower level of the home, Taliah ascended the staircase tentatively calling out "Mama?" Receiving no response, Liah made her way towards her parents' bedroom. Finding the door partially ajar, Liah pushed it the rest of the way open and slipped inside the room. A soft gasp escaped the young girl's throat as she took in the appearance of what she'd always known to be an immaculate living space. Large piles of clothing littered the carpet leaving only slivers of the flooring visible. Empty bottles of various sizes of alcohol cluttered the nightstand and dressers. Discarded pizza boxes that were likely several days old had been tossed in a corner of the room and laying atop of an unmade bed surrounded by soiled laundry was her sleeping mother. With her stomach audibly voicing its need for nutrition, Taliah started across the room, side stepping a few piles of clothes. Upon reaching the four poster bed, Liah gently shook her mother's arm saying "Mama, are you going to make dinner?"
An incoherent grumble sounded from the woman's slumbering form as her mother rolled over onto her side. After noting no further movement on her mother's part, Taliah sighed and trudged out of the room. Descending the staircase, Liah returned to the den to find her sisters still curled up in the chair. Gesturing for them to follow her, Taliah ambled into the kitchen. Pushing a foot stool in front of the fridge, Taliah climbed atop it and pulled down a box of cereal. Placing it on the counter, Liah grabbed three bowls from the cabinet before stepping off the foot stool and returning it to the corner where it belonged. Taliah turned just as Tanice pulled a jug of milk from the fridge and as she poured cereal into each bowl, Tanice filled each with milk. Grabbing a bowl for herself and Tanya whom had awakened just in time for dinner, Taliah presented it to her baby sister and the three ate in silence.
Dropping the empty bowls in the sink, the trio ascended the staircase and headed for Tanya's room. While Tanice carried Tanya into the bathroom to wash up, Taliah pulled a pair of pajamas from the drawer and lay them across the small twin bed. Assured that Tanice would see to it that Tanya was tucked in properly and likely stay with her until she drifted back off to sleep, Taliah withdrew from the room and meandered down the hallway to the bedroom that she shared with Tanice. Alone for the first time that night, Liah plucked a small picture frame from the nightstand. The young girl stared at the smiling faces in the photo for several minutes before summoning up the strength to put it back down. Flopping down on the bed, Liah wrapped her arms about herself and let the tears flow until finally drifting off into a restless sleep.
The phrase had been repeated nearly a dozen times and yet the words still held no meaning for Taliah. Her teachers were sorry, her classmates were sorry, even family members that they hadn't heard from in several years were sorry, Liah was virtually drowning in apologies and yet she still felt unbearably hollow as she cradled Tanya's head in the crook of her arm. It was then that the young girl realized that the well wishers weren't sorry for what happened, they were sorry that there was nothing they could do to make it better. The apology did far more for them then it would ever do for her. As the young girl reflected on the uselessness of the sentiment, a prickly 'pins and needles sensation had begun in her fingertips and was rapidly sweeping up the length of Taliah's arm indicating that the appendage was 'falling asleep but she dare not move out of fear of disturbing the slumbering child. In a way it was somewhat reflective of her current state of mind. A fascinating, yet perplexing blend of numbness and pain. With Tanya resting comfortably in her arms, Taliah then shifted her gaze to Tanice whom instinctively turned to face her at precisely the exact same moment. As twins, the pair had always shared a deep bond that often allowed them to communicate with one another with a simple glance or unassuming gesture.
Which proved invaluable these days as her sister had all but ceased speaking since being informed that their father had gone to heaven. Their mother had grown frustrated on several occasions with Tanice's vow of silence, but Taliah knew that her sister would speak again when she was ready and that her healing couldn't be rushed. Taliah gestured towards Tanya with her head then returned her gaze to Tanice who nodded in understanding and opened her arms allowing Liah to deposit their sister into them. Liah slid off the loveseat that the three of them had been huddled together on and timidly shuffled into the living room where their guests for lack of a better word had been gathered. Having run out of cliche and wholly meaningless expressions of encouragement, comfort, and support, the mourners had moved on to leave the family of four to stew in their grief. As much as the incessant chatter had annoyed Taliah, as she scurried from room to room seeking out her mother, the young girl decided that the awkward silence that had settled upon the home was infinitely worse.
Having scoured the entire lower level of the home, Taliah ascended the staircase tentatively calling out "Mama?" Receiving no response, Liah made her way towards her parents' bedroom. Finding the door partially ajar, Liah pushed it the rest of the way open and slipped inside the room. A soft gasp escaped the young girl's throat as she took in the appearance of what she'd always known to be an immaculate living space. Large piles of clothing littered the carpet leaving only slivers of the flooring visible. Empty bottles of various sizes of alcohol cluttered the nightstand and dressers. Discarded pizza boxes that were likely several days old had been tossed in a corner of the room and laying atop of an unmade bed surrounded by soiled laundry was her sleeping mother. With her stomach audibly voicing its need for nutrition, Taliah started across the room, side stepping a few piles of clothes. Upon reaching the four poster bed, Liah gently shook her mother's arm saying "Mama, are you going to make dinner?"
An incoherent grumble sounded from the woman's slumbering form as her mother rolled over onto her side. After noting no further movement on her mother's part, Taliah sighed and trudged out of the room. Descending the staircase, Liah returned to the den to find her sisters still curled up in the chair. Gesturing for them to follow her, Taliah ambled into the kitchen. Pushing a foot stool in front of the fridge, Taliah climbed atop it and pulled down a box of cereal. Placing it on the counter, Liah grabbed three bowls from the cabinet before stepping off the foot stool and returning it to the corner where it belonged. Taliah turned just as Tanice pulled a jug of milk from the fridge and as she poured cereal into each bowl, Tanice filled each with milk. Grabbing a bowl for herself and Tanya whom had awakened just in time for dinner, Taliah presented it to her baby sister and the three ate in silence.
Dropping the empty bowls in the sink, the trio ascended the staircase and headed for Tanya's room. While Tanice carried Tanya into the bathroom to wash up, Taliah pulled a pair of pajamas from the drawer and lay them across the small twin bed. Assured that Tanice would see to it that Tanya was tucked in properly and likely stay with her until she drifted back off to sleep, Taliah withdrew from the room and meandered down the hallway to the bedroom that she shared with Tanice. Alone for the first time that night, Liah plucked a small picture frame from the nightstand. The young girl stared at the smiling faces in the photo for several minutes before summoning up the strength to put it back down. Flopping down on the bed, Liah wrapped her arms about herself and let the tears flow until finally drifting off into a restless sleep.